TIP 1. Work to develop caring, loving relationships with your kids.


Children learn to care and respect when they are treated that way. When our children feel loved, they also become attached to us. That attachment makes them more receptive to our values and teaching.


Loving our children takes many forms, such as tending to their physical and emotional needs, providing a stable and secure family environment, showing affection, respecting their individual personalities, taking a genuine interest in their lives, talking about things that matter, and affirming their efforts and achievements.


  • Regular time together. Plan regular, emotionally intimate time with your children. Some parents and caretakers do this through nightly bedtime reading or other shared activities. Some build one-on-one time with their children into their weekly schedules rather than leaving it to chance. You might, for example, spend one Saturday afternoon a month with each of your children doing something you both enjoy.

  • Meaningful conversation. Whenever you have time with your child, take turns asking each other questions that bring out your thoughts, feelings, and experiences. Ask questions such as:

    • “What was the best part of your day? The hardest part?”

    • “What did you accomplish today that you feel good about?”

    • “What’s something nice someone did for you today? What’s something nice you did?”

    • “What’s something you learned today—in school or outside of school?”

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